With U Podcast

Real conversations about relationships, family, marriage, and the moments that shape us. Each week, hosts David and Tara Van Dyke explore the science, stories, and practical insights that help people build deeper connection and live with greater purpose.


David is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and professor. Tara is a childbirth educator, doula, and relationship educator. Married for more than 34 years and parents of 4 children, they combine decades of professional experience with candid conversations to help you strengthen connections, navigate life's transitions, and thrive.

EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT:

The wait is over! Our new book is now available for preorder.

In With You in Marriage, David and Tara Van Dyke offer couples a transformative approach to building deeper connection and lasting partnership through principles from family systems theory, relational research insights, and foundational truths from Scripture.

Whether you’re engaged, newly married, celebrating decades together, or working through a challenging season, With You in Marriage provides depth and practical wisdom to strengthen your marriage in every season of your life together.

Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

LOVE [a fruit of the spirit]

Join us as we begin our journey through the fruit of the Spirit, starting with the one that underpins them all—love. In this episode, we lean into love through story, scripture, poetry, and our own reflections, exploring what it means to cultivate a love that is patient, selfless, and rooted in something deeper than feeling. Whether you're new to faith or have walked this path for years, we invite you to sit with us and discover how love can take root and grow in the everyday moments of our lives. 

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

109. Fruit of the Spirit

Do you ever get tired of trying so hard to be a better person? To show more love, more patience, more kindness—or a little more self-control? What if growth isn’t just about trying harder, but about staying connected to the One who is the source of it all? In this first episode of our new season, we explore the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22–23 and Jesus’ invitation to remain in him, like branches connected to a vine. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control are not achievements we produce through personal effort, but qualities that grow from our connection to God. Using the metaphor of trees in an ecosystem, we consider how healthy relationships and communities depend on good roots, shared nourishment, and mutual support. 

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

108. Tricky Topics #7: Mental Health

When we talk about mental health, it’s easy to focus on symptoms, stressors, and concerns about what’s “normal”, but there’s so much more to consider in this conversation. In this final episode of our Tricky Topics series, we explore the difference between mental and emotional well-being and the struggles that are often labeled as disorders. We look at how the history of institutionalizing people for challenges such as “hysteria” and “melancholy” continues to cast a shadow over these conversations, and how diagnoses can become identities rather than experiences we’re navigating. We wrap up with some practical encouragement for bringing mental health into the light, one gentle conversation at a time, with trusted people in our lives or a professional who can help.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

107. Tricky Topics #6: Money (with Jim Danielson)

Money can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re not sure where to start—or how to talk about it with the person you share your life with. But having a plan can make all the difference. In this episode of our Tricky Topics series, we sit down with Jim, a financial advisor with 22 years of experience and a heart for the emotional side of money, to unpack why couples go silent when the conversation turns to finances. From generational money scripts and the shame of not knowing enough to the “freedom fence” of budgeting and teaching kids the joy of giving, Jim shares stories from decades of helping people build a plan and get on the same page.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

106: Tricky Topic #5: Death & Dying (with Dr. Kimberly Rich)

Thinking about the inevitability of death and the process of dying makes many people quite uncomfortable—but talking about it might help us face it with a little less fear and a little more openness. Our own personal stories with loss—from growing up in a funeral director’s home to walking through the deaths of both our fathers—set the stage for a conversation with Dr. Kim Rich, grief educator, death doula, and founder of Tomorrow Mourning. Kim helps us think beyond fear and euphemism to consider how we can prepare for the end of life with thoughtfulness and even beauty. We talk about navigating the logistics of a life that’s ending, supporting those who are grieving, creating a joyful and meaningful memorial, and why it’s never too early to write down your wishes—or even have a say in your own obituary. 

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

105. Tricky Topic #4: Politics (with Kaitlyn Schiess)

Politics might be the ultimate dinner-table taboo—and if we’re honest, it’s a topic we rarely tackle! Our own personal stories with political events — from counter-protesting teacher strikes to experiencing a military coup overseas — set the stage for a conversation with Kaitlyn Schiess, political theology scholar and author of The Liturgy of Politics. Kaitlyn helps us think beyond elections and arguments to consider politics as the everyday work of how communities care for one another. Together, we talk about why politics feels so personal, how to have hard conversations without turning up the heat, and why the best place to start might look less like a debate and more like helping a neighbor in need.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Tricky Topic #3: Gender & Sexuality (with Dr. Mark Yarhouse)

Growing up in a culture where conversations about gender identity and sexuality just didn’t happen, we admit we didn’t feel equipped when the topic came up with our own kids, and we’re pretty sure we’re not alone! We sit down in this episode with our friend and colleague Dr. Mark Yarhouse, professor of psychology and director of the Sexual and Gender Institute at Wheaton College, to tackle one of the trickiest topics parents face today. Mark brings both his research expertise and his trademark blend of conviction and compassion to help parents lead with love, navigate the journey after a child comes out, and find support without compromising their child’s trust. It’s an honest, encouraging conversation for anyone who’s ever thought, ‘What do I even say?’ and a good reminder that you don’t have to have all the answers to keep the door open.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Tricky Topic #2: Birds + Bees (with Jon Gabriele)

Why do we say “the birds and the bees” when we really mean developing bodies, sex, and reproduction? Maybe our euphemisms are a pretty good clue about just how awkward these conversations can be! In this episode, we’re joined by parent and teacher Jon Gabriele to explore why talking with our kids about sex can feel so tricky, whether avoiding the conversation makes it harder, and whether it’s ever too early to start.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Tricky Topic #1: Breakups (with Chris & Alisa Grace)

Breaking up is hard to do—but sometimes staying in the wrong relationship is harder. Why do we avoid the conversation we know we need to have? In the first episode of our new Tricky Topics of Conversation series, we’re joined by Chris and Alisa Grace of Biola University’s Center for Marriage and Relationships to talk about the complicated world of breakups. From avoiding hurt feelings and awkward face-to-face conversations to fearing loneliness, we explore why ending a relationship can be so difficult, what it looks like to break up in a healthy way, and how to move forward after the hurt.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

We’re Back!!!

We are so glad to be back—and there’s a lot to catch up on! In this season-opening episode, we share what’s been happening in our lives, what exciting projects we’ve been working on behind the scenes, and what’s ahead for the With U Podcast. Then get ready for a new series on tricky topics of conversation—the conversations that can be awkward, uncomfortable, or just plain hard to start. We’re glad you’re here for the next chapter!

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

The Promise and the Gift: A Christmas Reading

In this special Christmas bonus episode, we invite you to step into the ancient story of hope fulfilled.

The Promise and the Gift is a Scripture-based Christmas reading that traces the story of Christ from the dawn of creation, through the words of the prophets, to the quiet wonder of a child born in Bethlehem. We'll walk through the promise of redemption, the long wait, and the moment when the Light entered the darkness—and the darkness could not overcome it.

The Messiah has come.
And His name is Jesus.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

LIVE SHOW: Stories of Friendship, Faith & Formation

Recorded live in the Czech Republic, this special episode celebrates three decades of friendship, ministry, and intentional Christian living through the European Summer Study Program (ESSP). We sit down with David & Kriste Sveen, Kurt & Meg Tillman, Bill & Sandy Skowera to share stories of showing up, walking alongside others, and seeing God at work in Central and Eastern Europe. Join us for a conversation about legacy, community, and the simple faithfulness that changes lives.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

[Movie Review] The Ballad of Wallis Island

n this episode we discuss the storyline and themes from the film The Ballad of Wallis Island. Brought to a windswept Welsh island to play a private gig, folk music duo McGwyer Mortimer revisit their mismatched dreams and reasons for breaking up the band. Through beautiful music, lonely landscapes, and quirky character interactions we explore themes of regret, loss, letting go, and loving again.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

A Friend for Every Season

Friendship changes as much as we do over the years. In this episode, we get a little nostalgic about our earliest playmates, our situational sideline pals, and our long-lasting authentic friends. We share the challenges of staying connected in busy times, and highlight why friendship is essential to human thriving. With a few personal stories about baseball and hula hoops, we reflect on our gratefulness for the friendships that have shaped our lives.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Coworking On the Road

On many past road trips we've taken time to enjoy the scenery. But this time, are working while driving and bringing you along for the ride. On our way to a secret sabbatical destination to work on a new project, we share thoughts about what makes a good coworker, how to contribute to a healthy work culture, and our hopes for our own collaborative partnership in our professional and personal lives.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Lessons from a Four-Generation Family Vacation

What happens when four generations from four states gather for a four-day vacation? We recently traveled with family ages 10 months to 80 years for a holiday on Mackinac Island, Michigan. In this episode, we share what we learned about planning lightly, staying connected, and adjusting to a wide range of needs on a multi-generational trip. From ferry rides and horse-drawn carriages to rowdy meals and rainy-day picnics, we found that the best memories often came in unexpected moments.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Finding Strength in Your Birth Story

Every birth story leaves a lasting imprint. Whether your experience was joyful, complicated, or deeply challenging, the way you remember and tell it shapes how you carry it into the rest of your life. You’ll hear why birth is more than a medical event, how to shift from trauma to transformation, and practical ways to reclaim your story as a powerful rite of passage.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

More Than Just a Meal

Food is never just food. In this episode, we explore the many ways meals shape our social lives, reflect our culture, and reveal our inner world. From family dinners to first dates, guilty cravings to sacred moments, we unpack what’s really happening when we sit down to eat. Pull up a chair—this one’s for anyone who’s ever had feelings about food.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Fun Conversation Questions (Part 2)

Here we go again, choosing conversation prompts from a bowl and answering them on the spot. From Tara’s big 80’s hairstyle to David’s brown Ford Pinto, our stories take a turn into vintage territory. Whether you’re looking for a way to move past routine topics on date night, make family dinners more fun, or add some joy to a road trip, we hope this episode gives you great ideas for questions that lead to connection.

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Tara VanDyke Tara VanDyke

Fun Conversation Questions (Part 1)

In this playful episode, we take turns pulling fun conversation prompts from a bowl and answering them on the spot. From the time we accidentally camped by the side of the highway, to Tara’s sushi struggles, to David’s unapologetic love of pickle and bologna sandwiches—this episode is full of lighthearted stories and laughter. Whether you’re looking for a way to move past routine topics on date night, make family dinners more fun, or add some joy to a road trip, we hope this episode gives you great ideas for questions that lead to connection.

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Thanks to all who helped launch With U Podcast!